Can't Sleep

Ok. For those who don't know me (or don't know me well) I am an insomniac. Basically I don't sleep well. At the moment, I'm lying in bed with my laptop, listening to Sigur Ros. I gave up trying to sleep about 2 hours ago. After that I lay on my back and pretended to be dead for a while, which is surprisingly relaxing. Then I was a bit down, I needed a laugh, so I texted an old friend I hadn't seen in ages and asked for a funny memory. I got this:

A few years ago, when I was young and reckless, my friends and I placated our anti-authoritarian streak by doing mildly illegal things. In hindsight our activities were ridiculous and immature... But so were we. We used to go around at night and jump in people's swimming pools, we'd break into the water treatment plant, we'd scale half-constructed buildings... Yes, I know. I feel like a knob admitting I used to enjoy this (and probably still would).

Anyway, one night, a few of my friends and I jumped the fence of Sandon Primary School. We had our skateboards, a footy and a sense of adolescent invincibility. We mucked around there for a while, kicking footballs over roofs and having skateboard races around the vacant school, until one of my friends decided to climb up on the roof. Whilst up there, he whips out his todger and takes a slash on the roof. More than urination, this was his symbolic gesture of defiance aimed at the oppressive education system... Actually he just needed to piss. We then all decided to jump up on the roofs, kick footballs to eachother and see if we could skate along. We were up there for 15 minutes before my mate decided to race me along the waved roof that covered the pathway. We gathered the rest of the boys around to watch what would be the defining moment of our friendship. We took off, galloping along the corrugated iron roof, up and down the curves. I was in front when BAM! I slipped in something... My friends urine from earlier. I slipped ankles higher than my eye-balls. Then fell back down into a puddle of piss. Disgusted, embarrassed and in pain, I bounced out of the puddle and slid down the roof on my arse. I slid over a bolt, which ripped my shorts and... other things, before falling off the roof like Buster (the mannequin they throw off buildings on Mythbusters).

Remembering that story made me happy. I don't know why... It really shouldn't.

Talking About Stuff?

Ok, I understand that blogging about blogging is tedious and ridiculous but I couldn't resist.

The other day a friend of mine said "Blogging is just how people in 2008 achieve their 15 minutes of fame." (or something to that effect).

I responded, "More like 15 minutes of lame!" then looked for a high 5... Needless to say it was not forthcoming.

But is that true? Is that why we blog? Fame? If it is then it's stupid. Who gets famous from a blog? Does this happen? Is this possible?... Actually! Yes, it does. I read an article in Rolling Stone about famous bloggers... Most of them are anonymous... Oooh, that's an interesting point as well: What is the appeal of being famous, but no-one knowing who you are. Batman for instance!.... Oooh, that's another interesting point! How good is Batman... The character and the new movie. I was amazed. To be honest, I wasn't Heath's biggest fan. He was good in Brokeback Mountain, but I thought he was a little hyped. I went to Batman expecting to come out and go, "Heath doesn't deserve an Oscar. If he was alive no-one would care." I went with the explicit purpose of watching Heath. And as the film ended, I realized I hadn't thought about Heath the whole time. Heath wasn't there, it was all the Joker. And even though he was a villain, whenever he wasn't on screen I wanted him to be... I was so intrigued by the character that I wanted to see more of him all the time...

I'm listening to 2pac at the moment. There's a lot to be said for Hip Hop as a medium for expression but only when done well. Brag rap is the most annoying thing. You know those rappers that only rap about how good it is to be famous and rich?.. What did they rap about when they were poor kids in the ghetto? Before they got rich?... Anyway, 2pac is way better when he's political... Don't tell Gerry I said that.

Is 'Awkward' the new 'Random'?

First Blog? I don't know.

So yeah, obviously I've started blogging, which is something I never thought would happen. To me blogging is fairly pretentious. Do I have anything valuable to say? No. But I still assume people will want to read my crap... (Haha, just had an idea of people telling the future by literally reading crap (poo)... Like tea-leaves)

Personally I enjoy reading blogs... I'm not sure why. They tend to be pretentious if you ask me... WHICH YOU DIDN'T! That's why blogging is stupid! No one asked me what I thought! No one cares what I think about blogs? Why am I writing this? Maybe that's it... Maybe I'm writing this because no one asked me... Maybe I'm writing this because in the real world no one cares what I think of blogs... Maybe the blog is just an excuse to talk about something no one wants to hear, but you want to say?

Or maybe I'm just pretentious?

The most useful idea that's come out of this blog is reading the future through crap. It's basically fool-proof. Some old  clairvoyant sifting through excrement... All she can say is "The future looks like shit..."